The harsh truth is time is an invaluable resource. The harsher truth is it is also limited. No matter how hard anyone wishes a day will only have 24 hours, an hour will have only 60 minutes. Having said that, it must also be kept in mind the picture is not all gloomy. If only you could try becoming a master of your time.  That is all it takes. It may not seem easy at the onset but it is worth trying. Managing your time effectively can significantly impact your productivity and overall quality of life. In a world filled with numerous distractions and demands, it’s essential to master the art of time management.

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.”

-W. C. Fields

Just joking!

Let us explore seven effective ways to manage your time better, supported by credible studies and research findings.

1. Prioritize Tasks with the Eisenhower Matrix

The Eisenhower Matrix is a powerful tool that helps you categorize tasks into four quadrants based on their urgency and importance. This framework was named after President Dwight D. Eisenhower, who famously said, “What is important is seldom urgent, and what is urgent is seldom important.”

A study published in the “Journal of Personality and Social Psychology” (Tice & Baumeister, 1997) found that people who set clear priorities were not only more productive but also reported higher levels of life satisfaction. This is where the Eisenhower Matrix shines, as it enables you to identify your most important and non-urgent tasks, which often have a more significant long-term impact on your goals.

2. Implement the Pomodoro Technique

The Pomodoro Technique, developed by Francesco Cirillo in the late 1980s, is a time management method that utilizes short, focused work intervals (typically 25 minutes) followed by a short break. This is really very effective. I have even tried this with my son. Whenever I want him to get reading or practicing his music, I use the Pomodoro Technique and it works well. A study conducted by the Draugiem Group found that the most productive employees worked for an average of 52 minutes, followed by a 17-minute break.

This technique capitalizes on the principle of focused, uninterrupted work, preventing burnout and increasing productivity. By breaking tasks into manageable chunks, the Pomodoro Technique can help you maintain your concentration and manage your time more effectively.

3. Set SMART Goals

Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound (SMART) goals have been a cornerstone of effective time management for decades. A study published in “American Psychologist” (Locke & Latham, 2002) highlights the importance of setting clear, challenging goals in improving task performance.

By applying the SMART criteria to your goals, you can ensure they are well-defined and attainable. This approach helps you stay focused, avoid procrastination, and track your progress, ultimately leading to better time management and goal achievement.

4. Use Technology Wisely

While technology can be a major source of distraction, it can also be a powerful ally in time management. Numerous apps and tools are designed to help you stay organized and maximize your efficiency.

A study published in the “Journal of Experimental Psychology: Human Perception and Performance” (Barak & Rafaeli, 2004) found that participants who multitasked with electronic devices performed significantly worse on cognitive tasks than those who focused on one task at a time. Therefore, it’s crucial to use technology wisely by employing productivity apps, calendars, and time-tracking tools to streamline your work. Be wary of multitasking!

5. Delegate Tasks

Delegation is a critical skill in time management. A study conducted by the London School of Economics and Political Science (Deng, Gibson, & White, 2019) found that individuals who delegate effectively reported reduced stress levels and improved work satisfaction.

Recognize that you don’t have to do everything on your own. Delegating tasks to others, whether at work or in your personal life, allows you to focus on higher-priority activities and helps you manage your time more efficiently.

6. Minimize Decision Fatigue

Decision fatigue refers to the deteriorating quality of decisions made by an individual after a long session of decision making. A study in “Judgment and Decision Making” (Vohs et al., 2008) demonstrated that decision fatigue can lead to impulsive choices and decreased self-control.

To combat decision fatigue and improve your time management, consider simplifying your daily choices. Establish routines, plan your meals, and automate recurring decisions as much as possible. This will free up mental energy for more critical tasks.

7. Learn to Say No

Saying no is a crucial aspect of time management, as it allows you to protect your time and maintain your focus on essential tasks. A study published in the “Journal of Consumer Research” (Berger et al., 2008) explored the psychology of decision-making and found that people often struggle with saying no due to the fear of missing out or hurting someone’s feelings.

By learning to say no when necessary, you can prevent over committing and ensure that your time is spent on activities aligned with your goals and values.

Time management is a skill that can greatly enhance your productivity and overall well-being. By applying these seven effective strategies, you can take control of your time and lead a more efficient, satisfying life. The Eisenhower Matrix, Pomodoro Technique, SMART goals, technology usage, delegation, minimizing decision fatigue and learning to say no are all powerful tools in your time management toolbox. Try implementing some of these techniques from today, and you’ll be well on your way to a more productive and fulfilling life.

On that note let’s have a look at the story of Sweet Sarah. Sarah was always late to work. No matter how much she tried to be on time, or how many times her boss scolded her she just couldn’t make it. She just couldn’t wake up on time. Her boss said she would be fired if it did not stop. Sarah decided to seek the advice of her doctor. He prescribed her some medication and told her to take one pill before going to sleep. She did and voila! She woke up before the alarm clock sounded and headed into work feeling well rested. Sarah told her boss about the doctor’s prescription and how well it worked. Her boss said, “That is great, Sarah, but where were you yesterday?”

Hope you are not visiting Sarah’s doctor!

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Let’s talk about an emotion that touches each and everyone of us, from time to time, yet we are not very comfortable talking about it. It is “ANGER”. Anger is a natural emotion. It is one of the 10 tendencies of the mind. Having said that, it must also be kept in mind it is a very strong and powerful emotion. Infact, it just falls one letter short of DANGER. D+ ANGER= DANGER. So, it has to be dealt with very mindfully. Bottling it up inside is not a solution. Venting it out by means of violence, be it of words or actions, is not a genuine response either. How to go about it then? Is there no way that anger can be made manageable? The answer is good news, for anger can not only be managed with consistent and disciplined efforts but one can also get rid of it altogether.

Before moving on with ways to manage your anger, let us have a look at a joke.

Husband: “When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?”
Wife: “I clean the toilet “
Husband: “How does that help?”
Wife: “I use your toothbrush.”

See, managing anger is not that tough either (as long as the other one doesn’t come to know about it J). Infact, anger can be a healthy response to certain situations, but when left unchecked, it can have damaging consequences for your relationships, health, and overall well-being. Learning to manage anger is an essential life skill that can greatly improve your quality of life. Let us now explore ten powerful and effective ways to manage your anger and cultivate emotional resilience.

1. Recognize and Accept Your Anger

The first step in managing anger is to acknowledge its presence. Often, people try to suppress or deny their anger, which can lead to it simmering beneath the surface until it explodes. Instead, make an effort to recognize when you’re feeling angry, and accept it as a valid emotion. Understand that feeling angry is a normal response to certain situations, and it’s okay to feel that way. Sometimes, some scenario may demand you to be angry. The idea then is to act angry by not really being angry. Remember, how all your big, favorite actors look angry on screen? Act angry when life demands. Don’t be.

2. Practice Deep Breathing

Deep breathing techniques are a simple yet effective way to manage anger in the heat of the moment. When you start to feel anger rising, take a moment to pause and focus on your breath. Inhale deeply through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and then exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat this process several times. Deep breathing helps calm the physiological response to anger and allows you to think more clearly. This is Yogic Breathing. You can also try other breathing techniques like Balloon Breathing, Candle Breathing, Hissing Breathing which are all effective in slowing your system down.

3. Identify Triggers

To manage anger effectively, it’s crucial to identify the specific triggers that make you angry. These triggers can be situational, environmental, or even internal. By understanding what sets you off, you can take proactive steps to avoid or cope with these triggers. Keep a journal to record your anger triggers, and over time, patterns may emerge that can help you better manage your emotions.

4. Use “I” Statements

When expressing your anger or frustration, it’s essential to use “I” statements. For example, instead of saying, “You make me so mad when you’re late,” try saying, “I feel frustrated when you’re late because it disrupts my schedule.” “I” statements help you express your emotions without accusing or blaming others, making it easier for them to understand your perspective and for you to communicate effectively.

5. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a powerful tool for managing anger. It involves being fully present in the moment and observing your thoughts and emotions without judgment. When you’re mindful, you can distance yourself from your anger, allowing you to respond more rationally. Meditation, yoga, and deep breathing exercises are great ways to develop mindfulness and stay in control when anger arises.

6. Take a Time-Out

Sometimes, it’s best to step away from a heated situation. When you feel anger escalating, politely excuse yourself and take a short break. Use this time to cool down and collect your thoughts. A time-out can prevent you from saying or doing something you might regret later. Make sure to communicate your need for a break to the other party involved, so they understand that it’s not about avoiding the issue but rather about handling it more effectively.

7. Practice Problem-Solving

Anger often arises when you face a problem or obstacle. Instead of letting anger consume you, use it as a motivational force to find a solution. Analyze the situation, brainstorm potential solutions, and take steps to address the issue. By actively working on problem-solving, you can transform anger into a constructive force for change.

8. Engage in Physical Activity

Physical activity is a fantastic way to release pent-up anger and stress. Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters. Regular physical activity not only helps you manage anger but also promotes overall well-being. Consider activities like jogging, swimming, yoga, or even simply going for a brisk walk to channel your anger into something productive.

9. Seek Professional Help

If anger issues are causing significant problems in your life, it may be beneficial to seek professional help. Therapists, counselors, or anger management classes can provide you with valuable tools and strategies to address and manage your anger effectively. Professional guidance can also help you uncover the underlying causes of your anger and work towards long-term solutions.

10. Cultivate Empathy and Understanding

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. By practicing empathy, you can diffuse anger in both yourself and others. Try to put yourself in the shoes of the person or people who have triggered your anger. Consider their perspective and motivations. Empathy can help you see the bigger picture and foster understanding, making it easier to resolve conflicts and manage your anger.

A Zen student once said to his teacher, “Master, I have an ungovernable temper. Help me get rid of it.” “You have something very strange,” said the teacher. “Show it to me.”

“Right now I cannot show it to you”, replied the student. The master asked, “Why not?” “It arises suddenly”, answered the student. “Then it cannot be your own true nature,” said the teacher.

Remember, how you manage your anger can significantly impact your life. The ten powerful and effective ways discussed in this blog can help you control and channel your anger constructively. With consistent efforts, you can develop the skills needed to manage your anger and lead a more peaceful and fulfilling life.

Remember that anger management is an ongoing process and it’s essential to be patient with yourself as you work to develop these skills. With dedication and practice, you can transform anger into a constructive force that enhances your relationships and overall well-being.

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Here are some tips:

1. Find a good recording, with the correct pronunciation. It’s even more critical for Vedic chants because of the rules of chanting. Otherwise it’s a case of the blind leading the blind. Can’t over-emphasize this.
   
   
2. Split up a long chant into smaller parts. Say you’re learning the Rudram. Use a recorder app on your phone (I have one that’s called Voice Notes that is fantastic for this purpose) that can change the speed of the recorded bit. Record what you think is your capacity to memorize – say half an anuvaka of the Rudram or even less. Record the whole chant in these smaller bits.
   
   
3. Print out the bits separately so you’ll have many separate pieces of paper with the sections you’re working on.
   
   
4. Keep the one you’re memorizing close – in your pocket.
   
   
5. Listen to the chant while reading the lyrics. Slow down the speed to get the correct pronunciation, the inflections and so on.
   
   
6. Repeat on your own. Listen again. Repeat. Again and again. And again.
   
   
7. The method that works for me is to learn verse one, and then when I memorize verse two, to go back and chant verses one and two so that I get the continuity. So if you get to verse 25, go back and chant 1-25. That’s the way to ensure you go smoothly from verse to verse.
   
   
8. Listen to the chant (or at least the bit) while falling asleep at night. Listen to again first thing in the morning. It gets embedded in your subconscious mind (which is why the correct pronunciation and method of chanting are crucial – very hard to undo this once learned the wrong way).
   
   
9. Practice! Chant while showering, driving, cooking, exercising…
   
   
10. Record yourself chanting and take notes – did you miss an anusvara? Did you pronounce a hrsva svara as a dhirga, and so on… correct them and record again.
    
    
11. Once you’ve learned the whole chant, it’s time to fine tune – get back to the beginning and correct all the minor issues (point above).
    
    
12. Now is the time to focus on the meaning of the words as you chant it. Without the bhavana, the chant is not really all that useful. So, make the effort to study it, and meditate on the meaning. See what happens when you say, “Om Namo Bhagavate Rudraya!” Your whole being will begin to vibrate…
    

You’ll know you “have” it when it flows like oil being poured steadily into a container – the entire mind is concentrated on the flow of the chant and the world ceases to exist. This is where the magic begins. You’ll often find you are out of the body, the chant being the vehicle for an incredible expansion of perception.

Have fun with it! <3 Happy Chanting!

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“The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office.”

Well doesn’t this quote by Frost pretty much sums up our self-motivation in its entirety? This also makes us reflect on the fact that most of us, if not all, are struggling with motivation because we are stuck up with work which we do not like. The implication here is not to just leave the work or job which is giving us bread and butter but how to stay motivated throughout the day with whatever one is doing. Read on and see how we can go about it. Trust me. It is very much doable with sincere efforts and the rewards are many.

1. IDENTIFY

A person once said “I am essentially very much motivated. It’s just that I have a critical partner, a lousy boss and a silly government.” Well, that person was me. We are excellent at identifying our dislikes which immediately put off the candle of motivation in us. Lack of appreciation and words of criticism act like fuel to fire of demotivation. We are doing jobs that we were made to do or which came along flowing and we quickly held on to them.

It’s good that we know what we dislike. Now take time out and identify what we truly like. What is that one thing, maybe 2, that instantly gives a glimmer to our dull eyes. This doesn’t, however, mean that we start chasing all babes and hunks in town or end up at a bar counter of a club till 3 AM. Reflect on your likes as only you can know what keeps you going. Singing, playing an instrument, writing, acting, playing some sport, posing for the camera and feeling good at the number of likes or just doing well at your workplace. IDENTIFY!

2. TAKE TIME OUT

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily. “

– Zig Ziglar            

Thanks, good old Ziggy for making the point simpler. Once you have identified that thing which brings motivation to you, spend time with it daily. Having read this you must be thinking you don’t have that kind of time. But trust me, you do have. In the 24 hours that everyday brings you can take just 5 minutes out for your own self motivation. Now what slot these 5 minutes will fall into depends totally on an individual’s likes. They can be a part of early morning, during the day or when you retire for the night. Totally at your own convenience. But, DON’T MISS IT. Remember Nike’s JUST DO IT.

One can easily think here what will happen by devoting just 5 minutes doing stuff you like. Well what happens by spending 5 minutes in shower daily? What happens by spending 5 minutes in eating? Showering daily cleanses you and is good for personal hygiene. Eating keeps you healthy. Likewise, doing things you like for atleast 5 minutes cleanses off internally. It is for your mental hygiene, to shower your mind. You can increase the time once you get into the groove but do it daily 5 mintues for atleast 21 days. Soon it shall turn into a habit you won’t regret cultivating.

3. SHARE SENSIBLY

In the Masai tribe of Africa, the greatest way of showing respect and conferring honour is by spitting at the person . Sure, you are not looking for that kind of appreciation. If you like classical music and are keen on sharing your little moments of happiness found recently due to the time you spend over singing or playing classical music with someone who is a cricket lover, you sure are not going to get right motivation or praise, if not getting disappointment. Atleast till the time you have not crossed that threshold of “I am not going to be disheartened or demoralised irrespective of what anyone says about my progress” be very careful about with whom you are sharing about your likes that you truly value.

Having said that does it mean you can share with those are close and closest to you. Well may be and may not be true. It totally depends on the kind of equation you share with your loved ones. If they have the same tastes, they may appreciate what you share. If your tastes differ, they may not be able to praise you but understand that whatever you are doing is important to you. If they do that consider yourself blessed. Do not over expect. Remember whatever you are doing it is for your self motivation not their. If I love to write and my partner knows that much it is OK. Now if I get after his life to read every single bit that I have written irrespective of his busy schedule then I missed the idea totally. At the same time, we must not forget we are in the digital age. There are plenty of platforms where we can get the kind of response we look forward to in almost very less time as compared to earlier. And most importantly, be your own critic by not being too harsh on yourself. The deepest recess of your heart will know how honest you are with your efforts.

Sounds a tough deal? Well think again. It is about going to your source of motivation and having your daily dose. Remember what G B Shaw said “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”

If you wish to know more about building on self motivation read here https://bit.ly/3dLWcgd

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ऐसा भी सुनने में आता है कि भई क्रोध बहुत आवश्यक है। बिना क्रोध करे कोई काम नहीं करता, कोई काम नहीं होता। लातो के भूत बातों से मानते हैं भला। ऐसी स्थिति में फिल्म का वह हीरो याद करें जो क्रोध न कर के मात्र क्रोध का अभिनय करता है। अति आवश्यक स्थितियों में आप भी करिये। अगर हम नाग भी हैं तो डसना सदैव आवश्यक तो नहीं; फुंकारने से भी तो काम बन सकता है।

क्रोध से ऊपर उठने के लिए क्रोध को निकट से जानना ज़रूरी है। ऋषि मुनियों ने, संतों ने, महान पुरुषों ने क्रोध के ऊपर समय समय पर प्रकाश डाला है। आइए देखें उनके कुछ अनमोल विचार।

1. क्रोध को पाले रखना गर्म कोयले को किसी और पर फेंकने की नीयत से पकङे रहने के सामान है; इसमें आप ही जलते हैं

– गौतम बुद्ध

2. कोई भी क्रोधित हो सकता है- यह आसान है, लेकिन  सही व्यक्ति से सही सीमा में सही समय पर और सही उद्देश्य के साथ सही तरीके से क्रोधित होना सभी के बस कि बात नहीं है और यह आसान नहीं है.

– अरस्तु

3. क्रोध पर यदि काबू ना किया जाये, तो वह जिस चोट के कारण उत्पन्न हुआ उससे से कहीं ज्यादा हानि पहुंचा सकता है

– लुसिउस अन्नेईस सेनेसा

4. सबसेअच्छा योद्धा कभी नाराज नहीं होता है।

– लाओ त्सू

5. एक क्रोधित व्यक्ति अपना मुंह खोल लेता है और आँख बंद कर लेता है

– कैटो

6. क्रोध मूर्खता से प्रारम्भ और पश्चाताप पर खत्म होता है

– पाईथागोरस

7. आग में घी नहीं डालनी चाहिए अर्थात क्रोधी व्यक्ति को अधिक क्रोध नहीं दिलाना चाहिए। कठोर वाणी अग्निदाह से भी अधिक तीव्र दुःख पहुंचाती है।

– चाणक्य

8. आक्रोश जहर पीने की तरह है और फिर उम्मीद है कि यह आपके दुश्मनों को मार देगा

– नेल्सन मंडेला

9. आपके क्रोध का मूल कारण अगला व्यक्ति नहीं, बल्कि आप हैं-यदि आप इस तथ्य का अनुभव कर लें तो आपकी समझ में आ जाएगा कि क्रोध करना कितनी बड़ी मूर्खता है

– सद्गुरु

10. क्रोधी मनुष्य यह नहीं समझ पाता कि क्या कहना चाहिए तथा क्या नहीं. क्रोधी के लिए कुछ भी अकार्य एवं अवाच्य नहीं है.

– वेदव्यास

11. क्रोध अत्यन्त कठोर होता है. वह देखना चाहता है कि मेरा एक-एक वाक्य निशाने पर बैठता है या नहीं.

– प्रेमचन्द

12. हम जैसा सोचते हैं बाहर की दुनिया बिलकुल वैसी ही है, हमारे विचार ही चीजों को सुंदर और बदसूरत बनाते हैं। सम्पूर्ण  संसार हमारे अंदर समाया हुआ है, बस जरूरत है तो चीजों को सही रोशनी में रखकर देखने की

– स्वामी विवेकानंद

क्रोध एक भावना है। साहस क्रोध को नकारने में नहीं उसे अन्य किसी भावना की तरह स्वीकार करने में है। उसकी जड़ तक जाने में है। साहस क्रोध से हर बार हारने में नहीं अपितु हर बार उससे ऊपर उठने के प्रयत्न में है । क्रोध हमारे अंदर है। शांति भी।

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Let us have a look at these quotes to better help understand desire, the mother of all tendencies.

1. If desire is a conscious process, there is no problem. But now that you have lost your awareness and it has become a compulsion, you are a slave to your desire

– Sadhguru

2. So long as there is desire or want, it is a sure sign that there is imperfection. A perfect, free being cannot have any desire.     

– Vivekananda 

3. To support mother and father, to cherish wife and child and to have a simple livelihood; this is the good luck.

– Buddha

4. All cravings are the mind seeking salvation or fulfillment in external things and in the future as a substitute for the joy of Being.     

– Eckhard Tolle

5. Wealth and rank are what men desire, but unless they be obtained the right way they may not be possessed. 

– Confucius

6. It is the nature of desire not to be satisfied, and most men live only for the gratification of it.     

– Aristotle

7. Learning is like a cow of desire. It, like her, yields in all seasons. Like a mother it feeds you on your journey. Therefore learning is a hidden treasure.

– Chanakya

8. Let your desires be ruled by reason.     

– Cicero

9. Thou shouldst eat to live; not live to eat.

– Socrates

10. Desires are only the lack of something: and those who have the greatest desires are in a worse condition than those who have none, or very slight ones.     

– Plato

The idea is not to get preachy. The idea is to understand true nature of desire so that one is better able to deal with them. After all the key is to lead a peaceful life and if desires only rob one of mental peace, they need to be re-looked at. 

Read about The DNA of Desires in detail over here – https://bit.ly/3dcDIVS

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Buddha’s quote has put one of the various tendencies of the mind so simply that it seems fear is something of little or no value when compared to others like anger or greed. However, when one starts dealing with one’s fear it seems a whole mountain to climb so as to overcome it. 

Fighting your fear can be obnoxious but the battle is yours to win. The harsh reality is, fear is cultured by people rather than being inborn inheritance. It gradually fits into your nervous system by your own self-delegations. At times, it can be intrinsic when any threat pops out like a snake in your balcony. But people are mostly worried about fear that is gratuitous like meeting new people, fear of rejection, fear of flying, public speaking or fear of failure. Facing these kinds of fear can be a sign of diving into a new realm where you never introspected much before. 

Everyone has fears and as long as one is human it is natural. It is only that understanding one’s fears makes it easy dealing with them. All fear stems either from ‘what if’ or ‘what if not’. In both cases one is looking at a future situation which is somehow not turning out the way one has envisaged thereby causing hurdles in fulfillment of desire. Does that mean one must not desire anything because that will again mean to be something not human? 

Here are some ways which can help us understand fear:

1. Let’s say we plant a mango tree. Why do we do it? Obviously because we want mangoes. Now what are we supposed to do. To make sure we take care of it by providing adequate water, sun nutrients and protection to it. But what if it doesn’t rain enough or rains too much, what if some pest gets to the plant, what if some goat eats the whole plant or maybe the plant becomes a tree but what if not the mangoes are not sweet enough, what if not the numbers are good!!!!!!!Too much for the little mind to cook eh! So this brings us to an important fact that ALL FEAR IS A MIND THING. It is all self created which has no existence. The choice is totally on its creator for how long you want it to live.

2. As pointed earlier, since the genesis of all fear is either ‘what if’ or ‘what if not’, fear has a great deal to do with one’s insecurity. Man wants a blueprint of almost everything and wishes to tread a path or make a choice about which he is extremely sure. Any kind of uncertainty gives the perfect ground for seeds of fear to germinate. This is also because whatever it is be it real or imagination people don’t wish to look at anything that is not a part of their comfort zone. They feel insecure and therefore fearful to think of anything beyond the comfort zone. But as they say, it is always better to step out of one’s comfort zone as nothing really grows there. So even if every plan or goal may have its what ifs and what if nots, it is OK. One just needs to look at them with a new outlook.

3. Another interesting fact about fear is, since it is all mind’s creation, it starts to loosen its grip over a person’s mental peace once you start to address it by looking it in the eye. It is a simple practice worth trying and one can see its effect. If at any point you are feeling fearful just take a moment and ask yourself what it is that is making you afraid. Address the fear. It may take you few moments to few minutes just sit with your fear and ask all questions around it. Get to the root of it and you will see in a few minutes it will lose its grip and also present you with some ways as to how to fix it in terms of taking appropriate action. For example if you are fearful about the failure of a task at hand, while addressing the fear you may come up with ways to ensure how to do the task more effectively. 

Remember the mind is a fabulous tool given to us to assist us in living our lives with ease. It is only a waste if we use it in creating something like fear which makes us less productive. Isn’t it funny that first man creates fear and then gets so overwhelmed by it that he wishes to have ways to overcome it. The truth however is fear is non-existential. Whatever fear is there it is about some moment of not known future. It has no relevance in the present moment. Just take it easy and take life moment to moment. It is just what is needed to shoo any fear away.

The post 3 Simple Ways to Understand Fear appeared first on Thethirdi.

Another truth equally strong is people never have an iota of uneasiness when the time is favourable. They only experience trouble when the time is not favourable like the current scenario of COVID- 19. As a human it is alright to go through all sorts of emotions. It is only natural. The purpose of this article is to share some ways which can make challenging times if not easier then a little less trying. Keep reciting THIS TOO SHALL PASS.These are unprecedented times which no one had envisaged.

Come to think of it, who would have ever thought in the ever busy life that a miniscule creature that is not even visible to the naked eye would create such havoc all around the world and brought our entire nation to house arrest. In the current situation when the unprecedented 21 Days Lockdown has been announced what is it that we can do to make our life and of those around us somewhat simpler? Let’s just have a quick look!

1. ACCEPTANCE:

   21 Days Lockdown! That is what it is. The sooner one accepts this whole heartedly the better one will be able to handle one’s own balance. Only then such a person can bring some stability to those who are around. Acceptance will make you more accommodating of other person’s reactions be it a tough boss or a tough partner. Cribbing will take you nowhere. ACCEPTANCE however, will make you OK about the challenging situation and give you enough courage to look it in the eye.

2. SEE WHAT YOU HAVE:

   Another simple way to hold the ground during tough times is to count your blessings. Take a hard look at what you have and be grateful for it. It will help you sail through better when the waves are rough. Look at the present case. People are supposed to stay indoors and that too for their own safety. Thankfully the advancements of technology are still with us. You can still reach out to your people through internet and mobile phones. Essential things can be ordered on all relevant sites. Had such a situation been earlier how it would have looked like? Express gratitude for what you are blessed with which many may not be having.

3. INVEST IN YOURSELF:

   Now that you are force locked inside your house it is time to reflect. How many times had you complained you could not spend time with yourself because of the extremely tough and busy life that you were having? If it is an indoor hobby that you could not pursue because of your busy schedule it is time you can revive it. Or else you can figure out other creative things which can keep you occupied apart from the work from home. If you manage to do it for 21 days you will gain a new positive habit. If you have another member of your family also interested in it, better for you. Something positive to stick to as part of daily routine in unusual times.

4. BOND OVER:

   It is always said people who stand together in difficult times are the ones to be cherished. You might have ignored your loved ones in the name of your work, your friends and many other things. This might have given birth to misunderstandings in your relations with your family. Now is the time you can bond better with them and let bygones be bygones. Make yourself useful at home. With domestic helpers also restricted, help each other out. You never know. The power of genuine love and care may already press the delete button for lot of insignificant issues that were blown out of proportion. Try to revive your bonds during challenging times. This will give a boost to your patience level.

5. TAKE IT EASY:

   This last point brings us from where we started. Remember the key mantra is “THIS TOO SHALL PASS”. It is a situation which is seemingly tough and daunting but it is not permanent. It is only for a certain period of time if not momentary. So isn’t it reason enough to just hold the ground tight and smile at the impermanence of the situation. Moreover, it is in our own interest and well being and that of our loved ones that we are being asked to stay inside our homes. Not in someone else’s. Even if people are accidentally stuck elsewhere just keep in mind your health is first and foremost. If you stay inside where you are it is only in your best interest. This is just a phase. Let the phase pass.

   Keep in mind. You are still safe. Breathing with your family who is also safe. There are many who are struggling and miserable. Pray for them . Just smile and stay put unil this passes.

The post 5 Simple Ways to Stay Patient during Tough Times like COVID-19 appeared first on Thethirdi.

If one cultivates kindness within oneself, gradually and slowly, knowingly or unknowingly one starts walking the spiritual path. This is because every act of kindness keeps adding on to your good karma and you become a natural recepient of grace.

So what does it actually take to exhibit kindness? The best thing is you don’t have to move a mountain to become kind or show kindness. With simple, little acts your purpose gets solved. Though there are a zillion ways to show kindness, here I am trying to mention 7 simple ways of expressing kindness.

1. Feed the birds.

   One of the simplest ways which not only is a kind act but also makes you feel closer to nature amidst today’s hustle bustle. Much harm has been done already to the environment which has destroyed the natural habitat of birds. By at least feeding them you can do some good to them.

2. Help someone cross the road.

   People are always in a rush today. It is as if life is like a race. Hold on. You can be different. Just try helping an aged person or a differently abled person or anybody for that matter in crossing the road and see for yourself how different it makes you feel.

3. Help a colleague.

   If you are working in a government or private sector, it is a given that you understand the level of competition that is there. Nobody wants anyone to get ahead of himself/ herself. Maybe for this reason one might also feel noone must know more than what one knows. However, if you can lend your help to a colleague in terms of your time or teaching a skill, you can express your kindness at workplace. It doesn’t matter but it does matter, if you see what I mean.

4. Donate items.

   This is yet again another simple way to be kind. It also helps you to get uncluttered. Just reflect on the items which you or people in your house have not used for long. These can be books, clothes, bedsheets, toys, utensils which are old and not being utilised anymore. You can donate such items to schools, library, orphanage, old age homes or any other place where they can serve some purpose and people can use them. Just do it and see how it makes you feel.

5. Do a task for your partner.

   Life gets mundane even at home. You can add some newness to it by doing a task when it is not your turn or even if it is not your job at all. There are so many things that you can do and make your partner happy when they are least expecting it. Clean the kitchen or washroom, cook a meal, get the groceries, do the dishes if the maid didn’t turn up, wash the clothes. Anything. And just see the look on your partner’s face.

6. Opt for car pool or public transportation.

   One of the simplest things that you can do to express your care towards the environment. Choose public transportation more frequently for commuting even if you have your own car. Or if you still want to commute using your car then identify people in your locality who can go for car pool. It not only brings down the expenses for all parties involved but also brings down the pressure on the air that we breathe. After all, the earth is the only planet you can call home. So the onus of protecting and caring for the environment lies on every one of us.

7. Sponsor education.

   You can also show your kindness by simply paying for someone’s complete or partly education. It can be anyone like kids of your domestic help, office boy, society watchman or anybody else. If you cannot spend for complete school education, you can contribute in some other meaningful manner to share their load. Like paying for books and stationery items or paying for tuition fees or paying for just one quarterly school fees depending upon your capability. Sponsoring someone’s education is a brilliant act of kindness that brings light into other people’s world.

These are just 7 simple ways of expressing your kindness to those around you. There are so many other ways of doing it. If you really want to explore different ways of being kind then explore this beautiful App Black Lotus. It has a section called “Rak” meaning Random Act of Kindness which lays down various ways of being kind. What’s more? With every “Rak” that you log you get certain points so you can easily monitor your kindness quotient. You can also see the trending kindness stories which shows what acts of kindness the other users of the Black Lotus App are performing. It is totally free. You can download the App by clicking the link.

Get Started Now!

Android – https://bit.ly/Android-BlackLotus

iOS – http://bit.ly/ios-BlackLotus

For more info on the App visit: blacklotusapp.org

Be Kind! Change for Good!

Posted By- Mallika Pande

The post 7 Simple Ways to Show Kindness appeared first on Thethirdi.

Soon after a few minutes an elderly man came to his shop. The fisherman was happy that the first customer turned up so soon than he had expected. But the man instead of asking the price of the fish asked,”Hey fella! Why have you written ‘Fresh Fish Sold Here’? What is the sense of writing ‘here’? It is very much clear that if you are sitting here, you are selling here and nowhere else.” The fisherman saw some logic in it. He took down the sign board and repainted over ‘here’ so the board now read ‘FRESH FISH SOLD’.

Hardly some good time passed when a lady walked up to the fisherman and said,”Why have you written ‘Fresh’? Do you mean the others here are sending stale fish? We are honest people and everyone here is selling fresh stuff. Only you seem to be new here.” The fisherman said almost apologetically,”You’re right Mam. I’ll get that fixed right away”. Down came the sign board and off went ‘Fresh’. The board now read ‘FISH SOLD’. “Perfect, young man” said the lady smiling ear to ear and went her way.

The fisherman sat back again musing over the things since morning looking at his fish which gave him a ‘dead look’ back, if you see what I mean. The fisherman was still reflecting only when 2 school kids came over and said,”Uncle Uncle, why have you written ‘Sold’ on your board? It is so obvious if you are sitting in the market with fish, you are going to sell only and not distribute for free.” The sign board came down for the 3rd time and after the next round of change read ‘FISH’.

It was not even proper afternoon yet and the fisherman sat there with the same number of fish there were. The only thing that actually diminished were the words on the sign board. And lo, there came a middle aged woman. This time the fisherman was sure like hell that the lady is going to buy stuff from him. All his assumptions got belied when she said,”Do you think people of this town are fools? This is the fish market. Long before you enter this place the smell of the fish makes it clear enough that people are selling fish here. What is the meaning behind writing ‘Fish’? Do you think we will mistake your fish for potatoes or apples?” The fisherman got exasperated and in a fit of rage immediately broke the board and threw it away.

This is a story that I read 30 years back but it is still so true even today. I’m sure a lot of us won’t find us any different from our poor fisherman. Infact isn’t it what most of us are doing and keep doing for most of our lives? In an attempt to get accepted we keep looking for affirmations and validations for whatever we do however small or big that thing is. How many times do we do something just because we feel like doing it totally irrespective of what the others think? The fisherman was new to the place and naturally wanted recognition and acceptance. But in an attempt to please everyone who came across he ended up frustrated. He kept finding logic in what everyone, even kids, said and kept doubting his intentions. Did everyone accept him after whatever changes he made to his poor sign board? Not necessarily. And these were people who were actually not interested in buying fish. They were only interested in passing on their opinions.

Think of the number of people surrounding us and the countless number of views and opinions they have to offer everytime. Can we actually listen to all of them and follow them all? No. Trying to please everyone is always a futile exercise. We do it mostly when our faith in our intentions is shaky. So what can one do? KEEP IT SIMPLE. Care about the views and opinions of those who matter to you, who are close to you and genuinely love you. Even this does not mean that you have to always follow what they say. But still it will keep the number of people much less. And most importantly, HAVE FAITH in your intentions and yourself. This faith can be built, it can be cultivated. The key again is turning inward. Go for it!

Posted By- Mallika Pande

The post But THEY Said So… appeared first on Thethirdi.