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Uncategorized Archives - Thethirdi https://thethirdi.org/category/uncategorized/ Thethirdi Sat, 28 Oct 2023 11:09:30 +0000 en-US hourly 1 https://wordpress.org/?v=6.9.4 7 Effective Ways to Manage Your Time Better https://thethirdi.org/7-effective-ways-to-manage-your-time-better/ https://thethirdi.org/7-effective-ways-to-manage-your-time-better/#respond Sat, 28 Oct 2023 10:49:27 +0000 https://thethirdi.org/?p=759 Ever heard of people saying, every now and then, time is money? Yes? No? If not, then you must definitely have heard people complaining “I don’t have time.” Most people feel lack of time to enjoy that favorite meal, no time to cherish that drive in their favorite car or with their loved ones, time […]

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Ever heard of people saying, every now and then, time is money? Yes? No? If not, then you must definitely have heard people complaining “I don’t have time.” Most people feel lack of time to enjoy that favorite meal, no time to cherish that drive in their favorite car or with their loved ones, time to meet those daunting deadlines. Why is time too hard to find? Have you also ever felt the same? The time crunch! That desperation of having a little extra time that would have made all the difference! Relatable, isn’t it?

The harsh truth is time is an invaluable resource. The harsher truth is it is also limited. No matter how hard anyone wishes a day will only have 24 hours, an hour will have only 60 minutes. Having said that, it must also be kept in mind the picture is not all gloomy. If only you could try becoming a master of your time.  That is all it takes. It may not seem easy at the onset but it is worth trying. Managing your time effectively can significantly impact your productivity and overall quality of life. In a world filled with numerous distractions and demands, it’s essential to master the art of time management.

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.”

-W. C. Fields

Just joking!

Let us explore seven effective ways to manage your time better, supported by credible studies and research findings.

1. Prioritize Tasks with the Eisenhower Matrix

The Eisenhower Matrix is a powerful tool that helps you categorize tasks into four quadrants based on their urgency and importance. This framework was named after President Dwight D. Eisenhower, who famously said, “What is important is seldom urgent, and what is urgent is seldom important.”

A study published in the “Journal of Personality and Social Psychology” (Tice & Baumeister, 1997) found that people who set clear priorities were not only more productive but also reported higher levels of life satisfaction. This is where the Eisenhower Matrix shines, as it enables you to identify your most important and non-urgent tasks, which often have a more significant long-term impact on your goals.

2. Implement the Pomodoro Technique

The Pomodoro Technique, developed by Francesco Cirillo in the late 1980s, is a time management method that utilizes short, focused work intervals (typically 25 minutes) followed by a short break. This is really very effective. I have even tried this with my son. Whenever I want him to get reading or practicing his music, I use the Pomodoro Technique and it works well. A study conducted by the Draugiem Group found that the most productive employees worked for an average of 52 minutes, followed by a 17-minute break.

This technique capitalizes on the principle of focused, uninterrupted work, preventing burnout and increasing productivity. By breaking tasks into manageable chunks, the Pomodoro Technique can help you maintain your concentration and manage your time more effectively.

3. Set SMART Goals

Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound (SMART) goals have been a cornerstone of effective time management for decades. A study published in “American Psychologist” (Locke & Latham, 2002) highlights the importance of setting clear, challenging goals in improving task performance.

By applying the SMART criteria to your goals, you can ensure they are well-defined and attainable. This approach helps you stay focused, avoid procrastination, and track your progress, ultimately leading to better time management and goal achievement.

4. Use Technology Wisely

While technology can be a major source of distraction, it can also be a powerful ally in time management. Numerous apps and tools are designed to help you stay organized and maximize your efficiency.

A study published in the “Journal of Experimental Psychology: Human Perception and Performance” (Barak & Rafaeli, 2004) found that participants who multitasked with electronic devices performed significantly worse on cognitive tasks than those who focused on one task at a time. Therefore, it’s crucial to use technology wisely by employing productivity apps, calendars, and time-tracking tools to streamline your work. Be wary of multitasking!

5. Delegate Tasks

Delegation is a critical skill in time management. A study conducted by the London School of Economics and Political Science (Deng, Gibson, & White, 2019) found that individuals who delegate effectively reported reduced stress levels and improved work satisfaction.

Recognize that you don’t have to do everything on your own. Delegating tasks to others, whether at work or in your personal life, allows you to focus on higher-priority activities and helps you manage your time more efficiently.

6. Minimize Decision Fatigue

Decision fatigue refers to the deteriorating quality of decisions made by an individual after a long session of decision making. A study in “Judgment and Decision Making” (Vohs et al., 2008) demonstrated that decision fatigue can lead to impulsive choices and decreased self-control.

To combat decision fatigue and improve your time management, consider simplifying your daily choices. Establish routines, plan your meals, and automate recurring decisions as much as possible. This will free up mental energy for more critical tasks.

7. Learn to Say No

Saying no is a crucial aspect of time management, as it allows you to protect your time and maintain your focus on essential tasks. A study published in the “Journal of Consumer Research” (Berger et al., 2008) explored the psychology of decision-making and found that people often struggle with saying no due to the fear of missing out or hurting someone’s feelings.

By learning to say no when necessary, you can prevent over committing and ensure that your time is spent on activities aligned with your goals and values.

Time management is a skill that can greatly enhance your productivity and overall well-being. By applying these seven effective strategies, you can take control of your time and lead a more efficient, satisfying life. The Eisenhower Matrix, Pomodoro Technique, SMART goals, technology usage, delegation, minimizing decision fatigue and learning to say no are all powerful tools in your time management toolbox. Try implementing some of these techniques from today, and you’ll be well on your way to a more productive and fulfilling life.

On that note let’s have a look at the story of Sweet Sarah. Sarah was always late to work. No matter how much she tried to be on time, or how many times her boss scolded her she just couldn’t make it. She just couldn’t wake up on time. Her boss said she would be fired if it did not stop. Sarah decided to seek the advice of her doctor. He prescribed her some medication and told her to take one pill before going to sleep. She did and voila! She woke up before the alarm clock sounded and headed into work feeling well rested. Sarah told her boss about the doctor’s prescription and how well it worked. Her boss said, “That is great, Sarah, but where were you yesterday?”

Hope you are not visiting Sarah’s doctor!

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10 Powerful and Effective Ways to Manage Your Anger https://thethirdi.org/10-powerful-and-effective-ways-to-manage-your-anger/ https://thethirdi.org/10-powerful-and-effective-ways-to-manage-your-anger/#respond Sat, 21 Oct 2023 13:13:42 +0000 https://thethirdi.org/?p=746 Let’s talk about an emotion that touches each and everyone of us, from time to time, yet we are not very comfortable talking about it. It is “ANGER”. Anger is a natural emotion. It is one of the 10 tendencies of the mind. Having said that, it must also be kept in mind it is […]

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Let’s talk about an emotion that touches each and everyone of us, from time to time, yet we are not very comfortable talking about it. It is “ANGER”. Anger is a natural emotion. It is one of the 10 tendencies of the mind. Having said that, it must also be kept in mind it is a very strong and powerful emotion. Infact, it just falls one letter short of DANGER. D+ ANGER= DANGER. So, it has to be dealt with very mindfully. Bottling it up inside is not a solution. Venting it out by means of violence, be it of words or actions, is not a genuine response either. How to go about it then? Is there no way that anger can be made manageable? The answer is good news, for anger can not only be managed with consistent and disciplined efforts but one can also get rid of it altogether.

Before moving on with ways to manage your anger, let us have a look at a joke.

Husband: “When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?”
Wife: “I clean the toilet “
Husband: “How does that help?”
Wife: “I use your toothbrush.”

See, managing anger is not that tough either (as long as the other one doesn’t come to know about it J). Infact, anger can be a healthy response to certain situations, but when left unchecked, it can have damaging consequences for your relationships, health, and overall well-being. Learning to manage anger is an essential life skill that can greatly improve your quality of life. Let us now explore ten powerful and effective ways to manage your anger and cultivate emotional resilience.

1. Recognize and Accept Your Anger

The first step in managing anger is to acknowledge its presence. Often, people try to suppress or deny their anger, which can lead to it simmering beneath the surface until it explodes. Instead, make an effort to recognize when you’re feeling angry, and accept it as a valid emotion. Understand that feeling angry is a normal response to certain situations, and it’s okay to feel that way. Sometimes, some scenario may demand you to be angry. The idea then is to act angry by not really being angry. Remember, how all your big, favorite actors look angry on screen? Act angry when life demands. Don’t be.

2. Practice Deep Breathing

Deep breathing techniques are a simple yet effective way to manage anger in the heat of the moment. When you start to feel anger rising, take a moment to pause and focus on your breath. Inhale deeply through your nose, hold for a few seconds, and then exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat this process several times. Deep breathing helps calm the physiological response to anger and allows you to think more clearly. This is Yogic Breathing. You can also try other breathing techniques like Balloon Breathing, Candle Breathing, Hissing Breathing which are all effective in slowing your system down.

3. Identify Triggers

To manage anger effectively, it’s crucial to identify the specific triggers that make you angry. These triggers can be situational, environmental, or even internal. By understanding what sets you off, you can take proactive steps to avoid or cope with these triggers. Keep a journal to record your anger triggers, and over time, patterns may emerge that can help you better manage your emotions.

4. Use “I” Statements

When expressing your anger or frustration, it’s essential to use “I” statements. For example, instead of saying, “You make me so mad when you’re late,” try saying, “I feel frustrated when you’re late because it disrupts my schedule.” “I” statements help you express your emotions without accusing or blaming others, making it easier for them to understand your perspective and for you to communicate effectively.

5. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is a powerful tool for managing anger. It involves being fully present in the moment and observing your thoughts and emotions without judgment. When you’re mindful, you can distance yourself from your anger, allowing you to respond more rationally. Meditation, yoga, and deep breathing exercises are great ways to develop mindfulness and stay in control when anger arises.

6. Take a Time-Out

Sometimes, it’s best to step away from a heated situation. When you feel anger escalating, politely excuse yourself and take a short break. Use this time to cool down and collect your thoughts. A time-out can prevent you from saying or doing something you might regret later. Make sure to communicate your need for a break to the other party involved, so they understand that it’s not about avoiding the issue but rather about handling it more effectively.

7. Practice Problem-Solving

Anger often arises when you face a problem or obstacle. Instead of letting anger consume you, use it as a motivational force to find a solution. Analyze the situation, brainstorm potential solutions, and take steps to address the issue. By actively working on problem-solving, you can transform anger into a constructive force for change.

8. Engage in Physical Activity

Physical activity is a fantastic way to release pent-up anger and stress. Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters. Regular physical activity not only helps you manage anger but also promotes overall well-being. Consider activities like jogging, swimming, yoga, or even simply going for a brisk walk to channel your anger into something productive.

9. Seek Professional Help

If anger issues are causing significant problems in your life, it may be beneficial to seek professional help. Therapists, counselors, or anger management classes can provide you with valuable tools and strategies to address and manage your anger effectively. Professional guidance can also help you uncover the underlying causes of your anger and work towards long-term solutions.

10. Cultivate Empathy and Understanding

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. By practicing empathy, you can diffuse anger in both yourself and others. Try to put yourself in the shoes of the person or people who have triggered your anger. Consider their perspective and motivations. Empathy can help you see the bigger picture and foster understanding, making it easier to resolve conflicts and manage your anger.

A Zen student once said to his teacher, “Master, I have an ungovernable temper. Help me get rid of it.” “You have something very strange,” said the teacher. “Show it to me.”

“Right now I cannot show it to you”, replied the student. The master asked, “Why not?” “It arises suddenly”, answered the student. “Then it cannot be your own true nature,” said the teacher.

Remember, how you manage your anger can significantly impact your life. The ten powerful and effective ways discussed in this blog can help you control and channel your anger constructively. With consistent efforts, you can develop the skills needed to manage your anger and lead a more peaceful and fulfilling life.

Remember that anger management is an ongoing process and it’s essential to be patient with yourself as you work to develop these skills. With dedication and practice, you can transform anger into a constructive force that enhances your relationships and overall well-being.

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Oh Secret Santa! Do visit again. https://thethirdi.org/oh-secret-santa-do-visit-again/ https://thethirdi.org/oh-secret-santa-do-visit-again/#respond Sat, 19 Dec 2020 14:14:25 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=608 Christmas is around the corner. Probably that is why the Divine Mother thought of giving me a break from writing on Her name. She’d rather I reflect on the merriment that Christmas brings every year negating the biting chill of the winter season. Her wish is my command. So here I am taking a stroll […]

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Christmas is around the corner. Probably that is why the Divine Mother thought of giving me a break from writing on Her name. She’d rather I reflect on the merriment that Christmas brings every year negating the biting chill of the winter season. Her wish is my command. So here I am taking a stroll down the alleys of nostalgia, laden with fond childhood memories woven around this beautiful festival.

My father had made this a thumb rule that our early education must be completed in convent school. Since he was in a transferrable job, every two years we saw a new school, a new convent and a new church. What seemed a common thread amidst all these was the culture which made me and my brother aware about Christianity and Christmas. There was a lot of pre buzz in our schools around the holy day which found expression through decorations, carol practice, carnival planning and a lot more. The most loveable aspect though for me and my brother was the thought of Santa visiting us. It wasn’t really a thought. It was a belief held strongly. There was no question about it. After all, Santa was our first angel. We used to come home carrying all the excitement that was prolific in the four walls of our school.

Our boundless exhilaration was met with full support at home too. The domestic helpers used to hunt with us the right kind of tree to decorate. Our mother used to provide money for the decoration stuff that was fished from the market. The lighting needed to be in place, so the electrician used to be summoned. Every year we wanted everything to be perfect for Santa. Santa never disappointed us. We changed cities, schools but He was there everytime, every Christmas, bringing us the choicest dainties on the eve, that we discovered every morning. Each discovery added to our cheer. The joy in our hearts was limitless. I used to wonder also at times, how does Santa know we are now in a different city? How does he locate us everytime? I asked my Dad too. He just smiled and said, “He knows.”

One such Christmas eve, I remember I was in grade 8 at that time, I was lying in my bed, wrapped in the warmth of blankets, trying to sleep. I do not know why sleep was elusive that night. Was I too excited that it took a toll on my sleep? Maybe! So I just lay quietly. After some time I heard some sound. It was as if someone was in the room. Whoever it was, there were clear sounds of stuff in the room being moved. My heart took a leap. “Santa!!! It has to be Him. What do I do now? Shall I take a sneak peek? Shall I try waking up my brother? Is it just my imagination?” A multitude of thoughts kept running my mind. The sounds were still there. I finally decided to have a look by just removing my blanket a little. This was a lifetime chance to meet Santa and I was not ready t let it pass. I looked.

The peek that I took shook me to the core. My jaws dropped. My heart sank. My eyes welled up. I still lay in silence though. I saw my Dad moving around the room, hiding things here and there, striving to make as less sound as possible. Seeing him there gave birth to another barrage of questions in my mind. Was it all a lie? Was it ‘him’ every time? Or just this time Santa could not come, that is why Papa did it for Him? These and many other pop ups made sure I stay awake for the rest of the night. In the morning, my brother was jumping and asking me to go hunting for our stuff. I did not want to do it. He continued to plead so I told him okay and followed him. He kept looking for candies, chocolates money and I just tried to smile whenever he showed me up a new find. My heart was screaming but I didn’t want to say anything to him. I thought he still ‘believes’. Why take away his belief from him? My Dad too asked why am I not looking for things. I did not look him the eye and just said I do not feel like. I felt like my innocence has been taken away while my brother was still naïve. That Christmas I stopped believing!

Years after now when I look back I see it completely in different light. Now that I am myself a mother of a seven years old, Christmas has again started ringing bells. Wasn’t my Dad my secret Santa always? The one who believed with us, the one who made sure our belief sees fruition every year. He took care of our joy woven around this time of the year. He had enough respect for our sentiments and our emotions. And I respect him for that, I love him for that. Having said that, I still wonder why once grown up we stop believing? Isn’t believing in fairy tales a good thing? They are all pregnant with wisdom on how this life has to be lived. Why growing up makes us disbelieve all that wisdom and makes us believe that ‘things don’t work out like that’. While I continue to wonder at these questions, this Christmas I wish to gift my son the ability to believe. I wish that he continues to fancy how Santa actually looks. I wish he continues to fly high with his wings of imagination and innocence. I wish him and everyone a really Merry Christmas!

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9 Powerful Mantra Chants to Improve your Mental Wellness https://thethirdi.org/9-powerful-mantra-chants-to-improve-your-mental-wellness/ https://thethirdi.org/9-powerful-mantra-chants-to-improve-your-mental-wellness/#respond Sat, 10 Oct 2020 14:37:04 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=518 Today is Mental Wellness Day and here are my two cents for you with a sincere hope that you benefit from them. Out of the several things that I have been blessed with in this life, one of them is chanting. Earlier I used to do it only as a part of my devotional exercise […]

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Today is Mental Wellness Day and here are my two cents for you with a sincere hope that you benefit from them. Out of the several things that I have been blessed with in this life, one of them is chanting. Earlier I used to do it only as a part of my devotional exercise but ever since I started using the Black Lotus App, chanting has become my best buddy. I have been devoting certain time daily now to my chanting for more than a year, thanks to Black Lotus for making it so simple.

Mantras are positive energy laden words that have the power to reprogram your mind, break patterns that disturb you and make you more mindful and aware. Chanting helps you to cope better with the ever bustling 21st century world that apparently results in stress, anxiety and depression. What happens if someone says unpleasant things to you? You either get filled with anger or sink into gloom. Why? Simply because unpleasant and bad words come rushing towards your ears with negative energy. On the other hand, positive words are elevating. Your entire being feels uplifted when someone says nice words to you. Today, even modern science and neuroscientists have started admitting the beneficial effects of chants on the overall mental wellness.  There are even cases to show that with increased mindfulness certain chronic ailments can be taken care of.

Chanting is as old as the probably the world is, especially in Hinduism. Having said that, chanting has known to exist in several other cultures around the globe as well. Mantras are pure sounds that have a frequency of their own. When chanted regularly with the right spirit they can bring about self transformation. Chanting also is a way to express your gratitude, compassion and connect with higher consciousness. It goes on gradually to check the ten tendencies of the mind which pull you down. These tendencies are desire, anger, greed, attachment, ego, passion, jealousy, fear, hated and shame. Chanting makes you more mindful of these tendencies and helps you to deal with them better. It has a soothing effect on a restless mind. It induces calm and makes you a more peaceful being. Not only this, chanting also has positive effects for your entire family. As said earlier, chanting has its own frequency and it armors not only the one doing it but also the entire place where it is done. I have seen the positive effects of chanting in my own house for my husband and my son. You need to try to see for yourself.

How to go about it? Which mantra to pick? Well, to make things easier for you here is a list of Mantras from which you can pick and just start chanting.

1. Om Namah Shivaya

Om Namah Shivaya. Literally the mantra means “I bow down to Shiva”. Who is Shiva? Shiva means that which is not. This in turn means Shiva is someone who cannot be perceived, atleast not with the five senses. He is the supreme consciousness. So the chant means “I bow down to the Supreme Consciousness” . Shiva is the Supreme Father. He is the one who is innocent and in His innocence has known to confer even such boons on His devotees which have put Him in trouble. He is Bhola. He gets pleased simply. He is Ashutosh. Connect your SELF with the Highest SELF by this simple mantra chanting.

2. Hare Krishna Maha Mantra

This is another simple but great mantra to chant. The mantra goes as “Hare Krishna Hare Krishna, Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama, Rama Rama Hare Hare.” It is a call out to the Universal Consciousness who is Krishna, who is also Rama. Through this mantra we beseech the Lord to take care of all aspects of our life. We pray to the Ultimate to keep us fed, protected and pleased forever in the Lord’s service. This maha mantra is chanted a lot in kirtans and satsangs and gained a lot of popularity in the Bhakti movement. Chant and immerse yourself in Bhakti.

3. Om Namo Bhagwate Vasudevaya  

It is a twelve syllable age old mantra dedicated to Lord Vishnu. Bhagwan Vishnu as per the Hindu tradition is the one who takes care of the entire world. He is the caretaker of all that is living and non living. He is the source of all providence. He is the one who provides bare necessities to unsurpassed wealth both material and spiritual. Om means the Universal Spirit, Namo means salutations, Bhagwate means Lord, Vasudevaya means the divinity that is in every being. Literally the mantra “Om Namo Bhagwate Vasudevaya” means “I bow down to the ever merciful and compassionate Lord who resides in every being”. Supreme  surrender is at the core of this mantra from which stems ultimate liberation.

4. Gayatri Mantra

Gayatri Mantra is another powerful mantra to connect with higher consciousness and appears in the Rig Veda. Gayatri Mantra is the Vedia Mantra which is considered to be over and above all other vedic mantras. Gayatri mantra is of many kinds but the most common is the Savitur Gayatri Mantra. It goes “Om  Bhūr Bhuvaḥ Svaḥ, Tat Savitur Vareṇyaṃ, Bhargo Devasya Dhīmahi, Dhiyo Yo Naḥ Pracodayāt.” The mantra means that we bow down to the creator of this universe who is none other than Divine Mother and we implore Her to remove the darkness filled inside us and infuse it with light. Several Enlightened Masters have translated Gayatri Mantra to have a deeper understanding of the same. Swami Vivekananda in His translation says, “We meditate on the glory of that Being who has produced this universe; may He enlighten our minds.”

5. Sarve Bhavantu Sukhinah

This is another mantra which with its beautiful meaning induces kindness and empathy towards all sentient beings. The mantra goes “Om Sarve Bhavantu Sukhinah, Sarve Santu Niraamayaah, SarveBhadraanni Pashyantu, Maa Kashcid-Duhkha-Bhaag-Bhavet.” Lietrally the mantra means “May all sentient beings everywhere be happy, May everyone be free from illness and pain, May everybody see that what is auspicious, May there be no one who suffers.” Isn’t that a lovely petition to put forth to the Supreme Consciousness?! Chant this one and sure you can feel the changed vibrations within and around you in few days.

The other mantras that you can pick are :

6. Navarna Mantra

Om Aim Hreem Kleem Chamundaye Viche.”

7. Maha Mrityunjaya Mantra

Aum Tryambakam Yajaamahe Sugandhim Pushtivardhanam, Urvaarukamiva Bandhanaan-Mrityormuksheeya Maamritaat.”

8. Sarva Mangal Maangalye Mantra

Sarva-Manggala-Maanggalye Shive Sarvaartha-Saadhike, Sharannye Tryambake Gauri Naaraayanni Namostute.”

9. Surya Sadhana Mantra

Om Hreeng Asva-Tejasya Adhovaani Svahaa.”

All these Mantras are there in the Black Lotus App with their correct pronunciation to help you better. There is a timer too, so you can choose the duration for how long you wish to chant. Download this life transforming App and reap the immense benefits of chanting, meditation and mindful living.

Read more about the app here – https://www.blacklotus.app/

Or Download the app:

App Store: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/black-lotus/id1225659190

PlayStore: https://play.google.com/store/apps/detailsid=com.rt.pinprickeffect.meditation&hl=en_IN

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How to Break Free from the Clutches of being an Introvert or Extrovert? https://thethirdi.org/how-to-break-free-from-the-clutches-of-being-an-introvert-or-extrovert/ https://thethirdi.org/how-to-break-free-from-the-clutches-of-being-an-introvert-or-extrovert/#respond Sat, 12 Sep 2020 14:29:57 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=464 Arijeet Dey, one of my team members from the SEO team, requested me to share my thoughts on this question. How to break free from the clutches of being an introvert or extrovert? I asked him the reason of such topic and he said due to the pandemic and the lockdown, some people have started […]

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Arijeet Dey, one of my team members from the SEO team, requested me to share my thoughts on this question. How to break free from the clutches of being an introvert or extrovert? I asked him the reason of such topic and he said due to the pandemic and the lockdown, some people have started thinking of themselves as introverts, especially since the social life is all ruined. What does that mean? Does it mean that they had never reflected on it before and thought themselves as quite outward person and due to the lockdown, in the absence of going out they have started feeling like an introvert?

Let us try having a look at why is there a big fuss about being an introvert or extrovert in the first place. Generally speaking, it is due to the shades attached to the 2 words. Introverts are usually seen as people who don’t speak much and do not readily express themselves. They are, therefore, seen as people who are low on confidence. Extroverts, on the other hand, are viewed as much outgoing and confident people. They are considered bold and with a lot of spark.

The demands of the world are such that the moment you admit you are an introvert much of those around you, from family to friends, start telling you not to be like that. They throw examples of people like whom you should be. They may even go further and start giving you confidence building tips or get you enrolled for a personality development classes and so on and so forth. Why? Because society doesn’t want introverts. There is no place or even if there is, it is just a mediocre place for such sheep. However, there is the whole world for the lion who roars. So, introverts- thumbs down, extroverts- thumbs up.

To go further on the topic like always I would rely on my guiding light Sadhguru who says, “Do not classify people as extrovert or introvert. Every human being has a right to be whichever way they want.” Can it be said any better than these words? Introvert and extrovert are just labels and nothing more invented by the society as per the societal needs and expectations. Based on these labels come judgements that are attached and are then applied to people. For example, label- introvert, judgement- not a pleasant personality, not likely to succeed, loner, not confident, low on self-esteem etc. Let’s see label- extrovert. The likely judgements- agreeable personality, likeable company, smart, confident, undoubtedly will succeed if is not successful already. Haven’t we all been around all these words since our childhood? From very early on, in-fact, we are told to raise hands and speak up even if we give wrong answers. At least the class will not think we are dumb. This thing continues with the years and before we know becomes ingrained in our very fabric. So much so, we start seeing ourselves in the light of all these judgements and start considering them true. Consequently, our own self esteem we place on a weighing scale and keep watching it go up and down. The reality however, stays the same. Labels are just labels. The good thing is they can be dropped. How?

The moment one is peaceful with oneself, being a certain way doesn’t matter. I have always been an introvert, if I have to choose that term considering that is the topic at hand. But, I bet people at my work place would not believe that. They would feel I am exactly the opposite, that is, extrovert. Personally, I don’t like interacting very much with people. I take time to open up and then choose consciously how much of my time and energy I can invest in any social transaction. At the workplace however, the situation demands to be on my toes, motivate the team, talk about what’s bothering them, try solving their problems, asking questions in interviews. I have to interact, interact, interact. So, I take on the role of an extrovert, peacefully, joyfully, consciously. What if someone says I am an introvert? Well, that’s totally his outlook without an iota of effect on my mental peace. It’s people’s judgement which as long as I do not take, they can keep them to themselves. Same goes for all kinds of labels.

It is totally an individual’s choice how does he wish to be. If a person doesn’t feel like interacting much it is absolutely fine. Similarly, if a person feels like mixing up much socially that is totally his outlook. The only thing is people need to be OK with whichever way they are. The universe always has enough providence for each and every being. Even the tiniest of creatures are not worried about making a living. Do not get influenced by labels and the judgements people keep throwing. Live fully, living will happen. So Arijeet, my friend you need to ask yourself. If you are an introvert, are you OK with it? Are you at peace with being a certain way you are, even if it is due to the current lockdown phase? Are you OK being alone? That is the only thing that matters. Am I OK being less interactive? I AM!

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How to Understand and Deal with Your Fear? https://thethirdi.org/how-to-deal-with-your-fear/ https://thethirdi.org/how-to-deal-with-your-fear/#respond Sat, 05 Sep 2020 14:18:56 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=459 Last week in the wee hours of the morning I had a dream. There was a mighty tiger I saw. Not a zoo tiger or a circus tiger, a real wild mighty beauty of nature. And it was crouching towards me. My heart skipped a beat. The adrenaline rush gave the usual 2 choices- ‘Flight […]

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Last week in the wee hours of the morning I had a dream. There was a mighty tiger I saw. Not a zoo tiger or a circus tiger, a real wild mighty beauty of nature. And it was crouching towards me. My heart skipped a beat. The adrenaline rush gave the usual 2 choices- ‘Flight or Fight’. I knew for sure I can’t run faster than the beast. His per hour speed limit beats mine extremely. So no point running. Flight was out. I thought of the second option. Fight?! But hey, have a look at the opponent first. Can I really fight the tiger? My good sense prevailed and fight as an option was also out.

So I just thought perhaps this is what the Divine wish is. This is what it is. I just lay flat on my tummy and began chanting my mantra. Just with this thought that if this life has to end let it end with the Divine name on my lips. Atleast the tiger would have a belly full. Some purpose this life will fulfill even if it is by being someone’s meal. As I kept chanting, the beast came closer and closer. Soon enough I could hear the sniffs all over and could smell the raw meaty odour from all over his face. Sweat kept tricking, I kept chanting for what seemed an era but may have been just a couple of minutes. Then the beast turned and walked away in the jungle from where it came. Just like that. At first I didn’t believe my eyes. I thought it may just turn and come back for me. But when I saw him disappear in the thick of the forest I knew it’s gone. I thanked the Divine profusely. It was like all my senses have just been infused with a new freshness.

When I woke up I tried to reflect on it. I found the tiger was nothing but fear. Come to think of it, isn’t that true. Isn’t the tiger our fear. What does it do? It eats you up. Totally. No matter what is its magnitude. Its very tendency is to cripple. Be it small or big, fear cripples and absolute fear cripples absolutely. It keeps gnawing at you from the inside. To quote Sadhguru, “As long as you’re identified as a physical body, as long as your experience of life is limited to your physical and mental faculties, fear and insecurity are inevitable… Only when a person begins to experience himself beyond the limitations of his physical body and mind, then this person can become free from insecurity and fear.”

Going back to the dream, my fear was very much real so long as I was thinking about life being bound by this body. I kept thinking of options like running away or fighting to save this body. But when I saw deeper I knew fear won’t end by pursuing such options. On the contrary, fear would consume me to the last bit. When I thought of life beyond this physical body I surrendered myself and the fear too, to the Divine. Isn’t Divine the source of all life be it that of a tiny worm or a human being? And it is when I surrendered that I felt liberated. I felt freedom from fear. In my acceptance of my fear lay my emancipation.

One cannot deal with fear without having an understanding of it. And to understand it one has to first accept it. Every fear is like a seed capable of becoming a giant tree if it is mishandled by running from it or resisting it. To uproot the weed you need to get to the root. You need to understand that life is beyond this body and not confined to this body. You need to be mindful of all your fears. You need to have a look at them and see whether they are still a seed or a small plant or have turned into trees already. And above all you need to ACCEPT! Just the way they are. Only then you can address them appropriately. Will you give someone a pill for headache if the person is having stomach ache? No. Fears also have their own strategy to be properly addressed. Small fears require less effort than bigger ones. So first accept and then address. 

To sum it up, you can’t run from it, you can’t fight it, you can’t resist it, you can’t ignore it. What is the best that you can do? Just accept it. The way it is and surrender to the Ultimate. It will walk away on its own. Isn’t it better than fear to eat you up? What say?

Here is an interesting article by Om Swami, the Realized Himalayan Mystic to know the source of all fears and how they can be overcome. Read on and understand your fears better – https://os.me/the-source-of-fear/

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12 Influential Tips to Memorize Chantings https://thethirdi.org/12-influential-tips-to-memorize-chantings/ https://thethirdi.org/12-influential-tips-to-memorize-chantings/#respond Sat, 29 Aug 2020 14:13:53 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=441 It’s an individual thing when it comes to memorizing long chants. Just from my experience of memorizing the Rudram, Chamakam, Vishnu and Lalita Sahasranamam, the Gita, and many other chants, it’s about discipline and practice. The chant must consume you. It should be the foremost thing on your mind. That’s the first requirement. This usually […]

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It’s an individual thing when it comes to memorizing long chants. Just from my experience of memorizing the Rudram, Chamakam, Vishnu and Lalita Sahasranamam, the Gita, and many other chants, it’s about discipline and practice. The chant must consume you. It should be the foremost thing on your mind. That’s the first requirement. This usually happens on its own, where the chant calls to us, and not the other way around. Whenever I’ve tried to learn something without being called to it, it has been even more challenging and usually slips right out of the memory bank.

Here are some tips:

  1. Find a good recording, with the correct pronunciation. It’s even more critical for Vedic chants because of the rules of chanting. Otherwise it’s a case of the blind leading the blind. Can’t over-emphasize this.

  2. Split up a long chant into smaller parts. Say you’re learning the Rudram. Use a recorder app on your phone (I have one that’s called Voice Notes that is fantastic for this purpose) that can change the speed of the recorded bit. Record what you think is your capacity to memorize – say half an anuvaka of the Rudram or even less. Record the whole chant in these smaller bits.

  3. Print out the bits separately so you’ll have many separate pieces of paper with the sections you’re working on.

  4. Keep the one you’re memorizing close – in your pocket. 🙂

  5. Listen to the chant while reading the lyrics. Slow down the speed to get the correct pronunciation, the inflections and so on.

  6. Repeat on your own. Listen again. Repeat. Again and again. And again.

  7. The method that works for me is to learn verse one, and then when I memorize verse two, to go back and chant verses one and two so that I get the continuity. So if you get to verse 25, go back and chant 1-25. That’s the way to ensure you go smoothly from verse to verse.

  8. Listen to the chant (or at least the bit) while falling asleep at night. Listen to again first thing in the morning. It gets embedded in your subconscious mind (which is why the correct pronunciation and method of chanting are crucial – very hard to undo this once learned the wrong way).

  9. Practice! Chant while showering, driving, cooking, exercising… 🙂

  10. Record yourself chanting and take notes – did you miss an anusvara? Did you pronounce a hrsva svara as a dhirga, and so on… correct them and record again.

  11. Once you’ve learned the whole chant, it’s time to fine tune – get back to the beginning and correct all the minor issues (point above).

  12. Now is the time to focus on the meaning of the words as you chant it. Without the bhavana, the chant is not really all that useful. So, make the effort to study it, and meditate on the meaning. See what happens when you say, “Om Namo Bhagavate Rudraya!” Your whole being will begin to vibrate…

You’ll know you “have” it when it flows like oil being poured steadily into a container – the entire mind is concentrated on the flow of the chant and the world ceases to exist. This is where the magic begins. You’ll often find you are out of the body, the chant being the vehicle for an incredible expansion of perception.

Have fun with it! <3 Happy Chanting!

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Ways to Understand and Deal with Stress https://thethirdi.org/ways-to-understand-and-deal-with-stress/ https://thethirdi.org/ways-to-understand-and-deal-with-stress/#respond Sat, 22 Aug 2020 13:46:21 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=414 I was wondering what topic to write on, so I just asked one of my co-worker for suggestions. Pop came the word ‘stress’. So thanks Anjali Tyagi, this one is for you. Stress has become a common jargon these days. More like a fad. You keep hearing it everywhere and from almost everyone. A kid […]

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I was wondering what topic to write on, so I just asked one of my co-worker for suggestions. Pop came the word ‘stress’. So thanks Anjali Tyagi, this one is for you. Stress has become a common jargon these days. More like a fad. You keep hearing it everywhere and from almost everyone. A kid has stress because of his studies, a teenage is having it because no one is able to understand him/ her, a graduate is having it because he doesn’t know if he will be employed, couples are in stress because they don’t know whether their love will see the light, parents are stressed because they feel their kids are not making right life-work decisions, employers are stressed because they feel their team is not taking the work seriously, the employees are stressed because they think the boss doesn’t take them to be humans and the story goes on. Everyone has their own reasons for their stress. No matter where you go, it is there with you like a constant pal. You just can’t escape it. It has become so customary that a person without stress is not even taken to be normal, if that is not an exaggeration. Is it possible for one to remain stress free then? Well before we get to the answers as to how it is possible, let us get to the root of stress and try comprehending it better.

Great men and Realized Masters have said volumes on stress so that people can understand it better. Sadhguru says, “Stress is not a part of your life. It is not nature of work that you are doing which is causing stress. It is just that you have no control over your systems. That is why you are stressful. You don’t know how to function smoothly within yourself. That is why you are stressful”. What does that mean? It simply means that we have attributed plethora of reasons outside of us causing stress inside of us. It also means that we are not in a position to use our faculties to handle situations in our life. We always stay in an imaginary world and think if such and such things happen, we will be stress free and at peace. The truth however, is such imaginary place stays only in imagination. It has nothing to do with reality which is in taking charge of one’s own systems like mind and intellect and dealing with the situations at hand. Procrastination won’t help. It will only make matters worse. Playing the victim too won’t be of any use. The solution lies in understanding that one is capable of handling any situation be it at workplace or personal life with the instruments that make every human unique; human mind and human intellect. Command them and use them to your own benefit. Currently the reverse is happening. To quote Sadhguru again “You have to make that sink deep into you that you are the source of your misery, you are the source of your Joy, nobody else, nobody else at all, nothing else at all but you.” Take charge! Solution lies in right action.

Diving deeper while looking at stress we need to understand what is it that we are doing in our lives and why? Let’s say if you are in a job that you love then why are you stressful? If you don’t love what you are doing, then you need to figure out what it is that you love doing. No one can and will do that for you. If you give this to be answered by someone else chances are you will again fall into the vicious trap. Buddha says, “Your purpose in life is to find your purpose and give your whole heart and soul to it.” The sooner you find your purpose the better it is for it is not time slipping but it is life that is slipping away constantly. If you love your job and you are still stressful it means you need to have a tight look at your devotion. Work pressure will always be there. Deadlines will always be haunting. But that doesn’t mean that these things must trigger something undesirable like stress which you don’t want in your system. If it is a relationship that is causing stress, then again you have to ask yourself sincere questions as to how you can give your one hundred percent to fix the unfixed. Blame game will not get you anywhere. No situation is worth taking a toll on your mental peace. Spend time with yourself and figure out your things and situations. Figure out your life. Find out what is important and dear to you and keep your passion up for it. For what is love-able in your life can’t be a cause of stress. Inculcate some self-discipline in your life and stay sorted. Sadhguru says, “There are only two types of people: Mystics and Mistakes.” You alone can decide which category you are into. It is a beautiful and precious life not worth creating stress. For all of it is self created.

If you wish to create then why not something wonderful? Go for it!

Om Swami, the Himalayan Mystic, a Realized Master and an author of several bestsellers has thrown light on how to deal with stress at length. Go on and read in detail how you can take charge of your life and how you can better deal with your self-created stress. Here is the link https://os.me/dealing-with-stress/

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3 Simple Ways to Build Self-Motivation https://thethirdi.org/3-simple-ways-to-build-self-motivation/ https://thethirdi.org/3-simple-ways-to-build-self-motivation/#respond Wed, 13 May 2020 15:58:24 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=200 “The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office.” – Robert Frost Well doesn’t this quote by Frost pretty much sums up our self-motivation in its entirety? This also makes us reflect on the fact that most of […]

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“The brain is a wonderful organ; it starts working the moment you get up in the morning, and does not stop until you get into the office.”

– Robert Frost

Well doesn’t this quote by Frost pretty much sums up our self-motivation in its entirety? This also makes us reflect on the fact that most of us, if not all, are struggling with motivation because we are stuck up with work which we do not like. The implication here is not to just leave the work or job which is giving us bread and butter but how to stay motivated throughout the day with whatever one is doing. Read on and see how we can go about it. Trust me. It is very much doable with sincere efforts and the rewards are many.

1. IDENTIFY

A person once said “I am essentially very much motivated. It’s just that I have a critical partner, a lousy boss and a silly government.” Well, that person was me. We are excellent at identifying our dislikes which immediately put off the candle of motivation in us. Lack of appreciation and words of criticism act like fuel to fire of demotivation. We are doing jobs that we were made to do or which came along flowing and we quickly held on to them.

It’s good that we know what we dislike. Now take time out and identify what we truly like. What is that one thing, maybe 2, that instantly gives a glimmer to our dull eyes. This doesn’t, however, mean that we start chasing all babes and hunks in town or end up at a bar counter of a club till 3 AM. 🙂 Reflect on your likes as only you can know what keeps you going. Singing, playing an instrument, writing, acting, playing some sport, posing for the camera and feeling good at the number of likes or just doing well at your workplace. IDENTIFY!

2. TAKE TIME OUT

“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily. “

– Zig Ziglar            

Thanks, good old Ziggy for making the point simpler. Once you have identified that thing which brings motivation to you, spend time with it daily. Having read this you must be thinking you don’t have that kind of time. But trust me, you do have. In the 24 hours that everyday brings you can take just 5 minutes out for your own self motivation. Now what slot these 5 minutes will fall into depends totally on an individual’s likes. They can be a part of early morning, during the day or when you retire for the night. Totally at your own convenience. But, DON’T MISS IT. Remember Nike’s JUST DO IT.

One can easily think here what will happen by devoting just 5 minutes doing stuff you like. Well what happens by spending 5 minutes in shower daily? What happens by spending 5 minutes in eating? Showering daily cleanses you and is good for personal hygiene. Eating keeps you healthy. Likewise, doing things you like for atleast 5 minutes cleanses off internally. It is for your mental hygiene, to shower your mind. You can increase the time once you get into the groove but do it daily 5 mintues for atleast 21 days. Soon it shall turn into a habit you won’t regret cultivating.

3. SHARE SENSIBLY

In the Masai tribe of Africa, the greatest way of showing respect and conferring honour is by spitting at the person 🙄. Sure, you are not looking for that kind of appreciation. If you like classical music and are keen on sharing your little moments of happiness found recently due to the time you spend over singing or playing classical music with someone who is a cricket lover, you sure are not going to get right motivation or praise, if not getting disappointment. Atleast till the time you have not crossed that threshold of “I am not going to be disheartened or demoralised irrespective of what anyone says about my progress” be very careful about with whom you are sharing about your likes that you truly value.

Having said that does it mean you can share with those are close and closest to you. Well may be and may not be true. It totally depends on the kind of equation you share with your loved ones. If they have the same tastes, they may appreciate what you share. If your tastes differ, they may not be able to praise you but understand that whatever you are doing is important to you. If they do that consider yourself blessed. Do not over expect. Remember whatever you are doing it is for your self motivation not their. If I love to write and my partner knows that much it is OK. Now if I get after his life to read every single bit that I have written irrespective of his busy schedule then I missed the idea totally. At the same time, we must not forget we are in the digital age. There are plenty of platforms where we can get the kind of response we look forward to in almost very less time as compared to earlier. And most importantly, be your own critic by not being too harsh on yourself. The deepest recess of your heart will know how honest you are with your efforts.

Sounds a tough deal? Well think again. It is about going to your source of motivation and having your daily dose. Remember what G B Shaw said “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”

If you wish to know more about building on self motivation read here https://bit.ly/3dLWcgd

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3 Simple Ways to Understand Fear https://thethirdi.org/3-simple-ways-to-understand-fear/ https://thethirdi.org/3-simple-ways-to-understand-fear/#respond Mon, 27 Apr 2020 05:33:41 +0000 http://thethirdi.org/?p=144 “There is no fear for one whose mind is not filled with desires” – Lord Buddha Buddha’s quote has put one of the various tendencies of the mind so simply that it seems fear is something of little or no value when compared to others like anger or greed. However, when one starts dealing with […]

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“There is no fear for one whose mind is not filled with desires” – Lord Buddha

Buddha’s quote has put one of the various tendencies of the mind so simply that it seems fear is something of little or no value when compared to others like anger or greed. However, when one starts dealing with one’s fear it seems a whole mountain to climb so as to overcome it. 

Fighting your fear can be obnoxious but the battle is yours to win. The harsh reality is, fear is cultured by people rather than being inborn inheritance. It gradually fits into your nervous system by your own self-delegations. At times, it can be intrinsic when any threat pops out like a snake in your balcony. But people are mostly worried about fear that is gratuitous like meeting new people, fear of rejection, fear of flying, public speaking or fear of failure. Facing these kinds of fear can be a sign of diving into a new realm where you never introspected much before. 

Everyone has fears and as long as one is human it is natural. It is only that understanding one’s fears makes it easy dealing with them. All fear stems either from ‘what if’ or ‘what if not’. In both cases one is looking at a future situation which is somehow not turning out the way one has envisaged thereby causing hurdles in fulfillment of desire. Does that mean one must not desire anything because that will again mean to be something not human? 

Here are some ways which can help us understand fear:

1. Let’s say we plant a mango tree. Why do we do it? Obviously because we want mangoes. Now what are we supposed to do. To make sure we take care of it by providing adequate water, sun nutrients and protection to it. But what if it doesn’t rain enough or rains too much, what if some pest gets to the plant, what if some goat eats the whole plant or maybe the plant becomes a tree but what if not the mangoes are not sweet enough, what if not the numbers are good!!!!!!!Too much for the little mind to cook eh! So this brings us to an important fact that ALL FEAR IS A MIND THING. It is all self created which has no existence. The choice is totally on its creator for how long you want it to live.

2. As pointed earlier, since the genesis of all fear is either ‘what if’ or ‘what if not’, fear has a great deal to do with one’s insecurity. Man wants a blueprint of almost everything and wishes to tread a path or make a choice about which he is extremely sure. Any kind of uncertainty gives the perfect ground for seeds of fear to germinate. This is also because whatever it is be it real or imagination people don’t wish to look at anything that is not a part of their comfort zone. They feel insecure and therefore fearful to think of anything beyond the comfort zone. But as they say, it is always better to step out of one’s comfort zone as nothing really grows there. So even if every plan or goal may have its what ifs and what if nots, it is OK. One just needs to look at them with a new outlook.

3. Another interesting fact about fear is, since it is all mind’s creation, it starts to loosen its grip over a person’s mental peace once you start to address it by looking it in the eye. It is a simple practice worth trying and one can see its effect. If at any point you are feeling fearful just take a moment and ask yourself what it is that is making you afraid. Address the fear. It may take you few moments to few minutes just sit with your fear and ask all questions around it. Get to the root of it and you will see in a few minutes it will lose its grip and also present you with some ways as to how to fix it in terms of taking appropriate action. For example if you are fearful about the failure of a task at hand, while addressing the fear you may come up with ways to ensure how to do the task more effectively. 

Remember the mind is a fabulous tool given to us to assist us in living our lives with ease. It is only a waste if we use it in creating something like fear which makes us less productive. Isn’t it funny that first man creates fear and then gets so overwhelmed by it that he wishes to have ways to overcome it. The truth however is fear is non-existential. Whatever fear is there it is about some moment of not known future. It has no relevance in the present moment. Just take it easy and take life moment to moment. It is just what is needed to shoo any fear away.

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